Hidden feelings

Thoughts are shadows of our feelings — always darker, emptier, and simpler.

~ Friedrich Nietzsche

When I went out for my walk this morning it was foggy, misty, drizzly, gray.  The almost still air was scented with dampness and decay.  This is the first autumn day that really feels like autumn except for the warmth (it was near 70 degrees).  The gray day made the changing colors of the leaves really stand out.

I pondered today’s NaBloPoMo prompt while I was out for my walk.  The question for today is:

Are you good at hiding your feelings or is your face an open book?

I didn’t need to ponder it for very long because the answer is very simple.  I am physically incapable of hiding my feelings.

Like the trees in the last image, I blush.  I am one of those fair skinned, reddish toned people who blush at the drop of a hat.  I blush when I’m embarrassed or feel stupid.  I blush when I’m complimented.  I blush when I’m the center of attention for some reason. (Heaven help me if I have to talk in front of more than two or three people!)  I blush at things most adults no longer find blush-worthy.  I blush if I try to lie.  And I turn red when I’m angry or have been crying.

If my facial features and body language don’t give me away, the color of my face will.  I can always feel the blush coming.  It’s a heat that rises from the chest into the face.  Pretty similar to a hot flash, now that I think about it, although hot flashes seem to originate in the abdomen (a true “fire in the belly”).

I think the only thing I’m capable of hiding is resentment, but even that comes out in some form, usually rebounding back on me through illness (a stomach ache, a headache, etc.).  Thankfully, I’m learning to let go of resentment and grudges.  They’re bad for the spirit and for the body.

Turning point

Feelings are everywhere — be gentle.

~ Unknown

I suppose it’s a good thing that I really can’t hide my feelings.  It keeps me honest for the most part.  The exception to that is when I’m not being honest with myself, which happens from time to time.  I don’t intentionally lie to myself.  Most often it’s a result of denial.

I am not always good at expressing my feelings in a verbal way.  Writing is easier than speaking because it gives me time to search for words, but it’s still difficult.  I wonder if it is related to the way my body expresses feelings for me.  No need, really, for words when I’m laughing, smiling, sobbing, frowning, blushing, or so angry that smoke seems to be coming out of my ears.

Eyes that do not cry, do not see.

~ Swedish Proverb

Dry

Sometimes my feelings are so hot that I have to take the pen and put them on paper to keep them from setting me afire inside; then all that ink and labor are wasted because I can’t print the results.

~ Mark Twain

Dry, the color version.

That’s it from the Bogs and from me for today.  Thank you for visiting.  How about you?  Are you good at hiding your feelings?  Or does your face tell all?

A shy aster hiding in the wood pile

Wishing you a delightful day, evening, or night… wherever and whenever you are on the spectrum of time.

At rest

The most important things are the hardest things to say.  They are the things you get ashamed of because words diminish your feelings — words shrink things that seem timeless when they are in your head to no more than living size when they are brought out.

~ Stephen King

Thank you, Pat!

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52 Comments on “Hidden feelings”

  1. Karma says:

    You have a very beautiful collection of photos today – they go nicely with the showing your feelings theme. I had to think about it a bit when you asked about showing our feelings. I think it really depends on the situation for me. In my job, there are plenty of times when I MUST hide my feelings – an inappropriate show of feelings in a classroom would lead to some difficult situations. Other times, in conversations with adults, I’ve been told that my eyes give me away.

    • Robin says:

      Thank you, Karma. 🙂

      I really admire teachers, and can understand why you would have to hide some of your feelings. It must be difficult at times. I worked in a pharmacy for several years, and had to keep my poker face on as much as possible, but I wasn’t too good at it. I actually made one customer cry after she yelled at me. Apparently I looked very sad. She was all apologies and tears and she was one of my favorite customers after that.

  2. Coming East says:

    Love your fall pictures, Robin. We’re going to Boston in a few weeks and hope to get some good fall pictures up there. As for my feelings, I wear them on my sleeve.

  3. bobmielke says:

    I just enjoyed looking at your posts all the way back to August of this year. You are a very talented artist who medium happens to be photography. Your treatment of light & color, combined with your compositional skill is amazing.

    I’m so glad I stumbled upon your blog from reading one of your comments. I certainly would be honored to follow your work in the future. – Bob

    • Robin says:

      Thank you so much, Bob, for the lovely comment and for visiting. (True to form — and what I said in this post — I was blushing when I read your compliment. lol!)

  4. You are quite expressive…or should that be quietly expressive. A good thing

  5. Joanne says:

    I agree with you Robin, writing is easier than speaking, most of the time. Sometimes when I speak, the right words escape me, then later I think “I should have said that!” after some brilliant ideas comes to me. I have no trouble speaking with my children though, with them, I am an open book!

    Lovely photos today, the trees are putting on the most brilliant colour show for you and I’m so happy to be sharing your fall with you. 🙂

  6. Beautiful photos! My feelings almost always show in my facial expressions, I think. If I get really upset, I go to the computer or reach for a pen to write it out.

  7. Phil Lanoue says:

    Thanks Robin, this is excelelnt! I’m one of those ‘keep it all inside’ types I believe.

  8. I, too, am a flusher/blusher. I can’t lie. And goodness, these photos are STUNNING. What color!
    Hugs,
    Kathy

    • Robin says:

      I’m so glad to meet another flusher/blusher, Kathy. Not that it’s good for you, but I don’t know too many other people who do that, and now I know I’m in good company.

      Thanks! I’m glad you enjoyed all the color. 🙂

  9. artsifrtsy says:

    Lovely post and gorgeous images as always. I have a tough time hiding my feelings too with my freckled pale face. Red ears = angry. It’s all over my face. I find that I actually do better in person if I’m dealing with negatives because I cannot connect visually with someone when I write. If I’m expressing love or compassion – writing rocks because I can put it all out there in print much more safely.

    • Robin says:

      Thank you, Lorrie. 🙂

      Oh, red ears! I forgot all about that. Same here. I can feel them burning when I’m angry. I think you’re right about dealing with the negatives in writing. It often doesn’t turn out well. I also agree about writing about love or compassion. It rocks and it’s easier in so many ways.

  10. Such a great impressionist feel!! Nicely done!

  11. It’s always such a pleasure to come here, especially after being away for so long. Loved your tree photography.. what a marvelous world you live in, Robin! I used to blush all the time and now I rarely do, I wonder why that is?? xx

  12. Your photos are beautiful, as always, and I am really not good at hiding my feelings either. They just seem to burst at my seams, pushing always to come out into the open. Great post!

  13. ehpem says:

    Robin – you sure have a way with light. These are so wonderful – I especially like the first two.

  14. Chloe says:

    i blush easily as well & i’m a terrible lier, i giggle. so when people are trying to play a practical joke on someone, i’m the one sitting there giggling awkwardly and give it away
    *sigh*

    being an open book is a good thing i believe, although i’ve gotten hurt in the past for it but i’ve learnt that being open and honest isn’t what can hurt you, it’s nasty people.
    x

  15. David Hall says:

    A great post with beautiful and colourful photos.

  16. aFrankAngle says:

    Another great collection. Meanwhile, I too blush easy. I’m a mixed bag as I commonly wear my emotions on my sleeve. Then again, my silent but perplexed look, is the sign that I’m processing … thus a question will probably come my way.

  17. Val says:

    Lovely photos – beautiful colours in them. 🙂

    I’d have thought I wasn’t good at hiding my emotions but when my husband and I first viewed the house we now live in, the sellers thought that we didn’t like it as we didn’t seem enthusiastic (or unenthusiastic). Now, my husband is like this – emotions rarely show on his face – except when he’s with people he knows – but me? I didn’t think that applied to me, but apparently it does! 😉

    • Robin says:

      Thank you, Val. 🙂

      When it comes to looking at houses or cars, I usually try not to show too much enthusiasm because they say you shouldn’t. I never quite understood having to do that if, all things considered, it’s a fair deal. But there are always games that go along with that sort of big purchase.

  18. Pat Bean says:

    This blog earned a Bean’s Pat as the Wondering Wanderer’s blog pick of the day. Check it out at http://patbean.wordpress.com

  19. Your photos are amazing!!!!

  20. tedgriffith says:

    I love the way you ended “at rest”! Beautiful. 🙂

    I’m told that I am exceptionally good at keeping my emotions, feelings and thoughts hidden. They scream to me, but all inside my head. It was very useful working in law enforcement.

    • Robin says:

      Thank you, Ted. 🙂

      My father was in law enforcement, and good at hiding his emotions too. I can see how that would be useful in that profession. Now that he’s been retired more than a few years, Dad is more open than he used to be.

  21. Beautiful post, Robin; I could almost smell the air with you. I loved the way you explored this topic, and it seems you have struck a nerve with your readers 🙂 When I was a teenager, I was once so embarrassed that I blushed from the tip of my toes to the top of my head and it lasted for at least 10 minutes. Fortunately, that never happened again!

  22. You fall pics are some of the most beautiful I’ve ever seen!

  23. CMSmith says:

    I absolutely love your first two photos. And the Stephen King quote expresses what I have always felt. That’s the challenge. To make what we communicate with our words bigger.

    • Robin says:

      Thank you, Christine. 🙂 I thought Stephen King expressed that well, too. I’m always struggling and stumbling with words to convey what I see and feel on my daily walks.


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